I broke up with Instagram
'It's partly me, partly Instagram'
Dec, 2019 - I just walked through the riverside of Budapest, my first time there, thoroughly enjoyed the Christmas festivities and took photos of Danube and its bridges, and I sat at a local restaurant to enjoy Hungarian food. Except I wasn’t there in the moment. I was thinking about the photos I took, what I would post on Instagram and what I would write there.
Jul, 2023 - I was at my friend N’s home. I was discussing my career and plans with her, serious stuff. Except, within minutes after the conversation, I swiftly opened Instagram and watched a hundred reels until I numbed and buried all the serious thoughts.
In Dec 2019, Instagram didn’t let me be in the moment. By Jul 2023, Instagram became a coping mechanism. In Jan 2024, I decided to take a stand, to break up!
Social Media definitely was fun when it started. Orkut was fun in 2008, as I could hang out with my classmates, from my hostel (There was no WhatsApp then!). Within a few years later, Facebook upped the game with better UX and bigger network - I was geeking out about Nolan’s movies with my high school friends whom I have reconnected with, half a decade later. Some years later, Instagram got in our lives and it was just cool - seeing and sharing photos of all cool thing you were up to. It didn’t feel like an addiction then. The reels and memes were yet take over. The Product Managers were yet to focus on commercialising the views. It feels different now. Maybe I just got older, it does feel like an addiction now, something I can live without!
Staying updated with friends was definitely something I told myself, is why I was on Social Media. But, in the barrage of memes, reels and umpteen stories of brands and celebrities, the reasoning felt hollow. The push/pull relationship felt off - I wanted to stay updated with certain friends, but the all knowing algorithm would show me stories and photos of who it wants to me. And, let’s face it, whatever that ended up on Instagram was unauthentic posturing. My friend V returned from her Ski trip recently and as she narrated her stories and showed me the pictures, I felt much more connected than if I had seen ten of her stories among hundreds of others’ stories. I will make an effort to stay in touch with friends, actually give a call. Maybe even write letters and mails. Friends matter, friendship does, just getting real about how I did it.
Sometime along the journey, Social Media became more than a place to hang out, to more of a source of entertainment, a cope if you will. If we had paid attention, that was precisely the point were our attention spans nosedived. A free moment in elevator? How about involuntarily opening up the app to see a few stories and reels? I have ended up delaying my bed time because the reels were funny, waking up next morning wasn’t. The screen time grew along with anxiety over the years. The relationship just grew toxic with time, I just chose to act on it now.
After Dec 2019, covid19 entered our lives, and unintentionally gave us a lot free time during the lockdowns, to think about ‘things’, and think I did. I wondered what was the point of it. I had an on and off relationship with Instagram, I was off more than on. Being updated on latest memes felt cool, tiny dopamine hits from posturing about the latest book I read felt good. The liability side was growing all along, costing my time and mental health. At the dawn of this year, I decided to Marie Kondo my life a little bit. Instagram and social media was definitely high up on the list of things that weren’t sparking joy. I clicked on the sign out button and only been happier so far!
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The above is the journey of my relationship with Instagram (and Social Media). I don’t intend to posture or take a moral high ground. But, if you are having second thoughts about your relationships with your instagrams, this post and I am here!
Notes on past letters
A quick note revisiting two letters from the past.
I wrote on 29 Jan about the importance of questions and how I aspire to maintain a list of questions, I stumbled on this treasure trove of 1000 questions from ‘Save Wisdom’ project, accessible here. Such a treat!
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I wrote on 5 Feb about finding ‘Joy in Repetition’, essentially how knowing something makes knowing more about it more fun. I stumbled on an old post by Byrne Hobart about ‘Convexity of Expertise’, which I feel approaches something similar.
Hobart goes on to say -
This convexity pays off when all the information is in your head, so you can draw as many connections as possible. And those connections actually improve your retention. As you read more, more details and omissions stand out.
And it pays off in another sense: over time, you get better at developing expertise and getting the attendant convexity. It took years for me to get fluent in my first intellectual obsession, with value investing, and took a similar time to know what I was talking about in online marketing. I’ve picked up the pace since then. Although my fluid intelligence has probably peaked — if you’re over 30, expect to get slightly dumber every year, forever — crystallized intelligence can more than compensate.
Things I found interesting
This is very much inspired by Tyler Cowen’s daily assorted links, Matt Levine’s things happen, Byrne Hobart’s Longreads, Anna Gát’s what to read this week and the likes. Looking to share what I read or watched and so on!
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Gen AI does not run on thin air
Training a super-large language model like GPT-4, with 1.7 trillion parameters and using 13 trillion tokens (word snippets), is a substantial undertaking. OpenAI has revealed that it cost them $100 million and took 100 days, utilizing 25,000 NVIDIA A100 GPUs. Servers with these GPUs use about 6.5 kW each, resulting in an estimated 50 GWh of energy usage during training.
AGI is going to be expensive!
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A bunch of handy charts about climate change
Basically, I see five key facts jumping out at me: Climate change is starting to get severe, Climate change is manageable, but we’re not there yet, The U.S. and Europe are no longer the biggest problem, Green energy is for real & Cutting emissions doesn’t require degrowth.
One quick look at where we are and what is ahead.
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In this age of multitasking, constant switching, and distraction, life is challenging us to master the art of coming back.
Something I struggle with, but the solution (as Novak says) seems to accept it, and to keep coming back.
My photo of the week
I started sharing one picture along with the weekly dispatch, from 12 Feb. Because, why not! An avenue for my experiments with my camera, and some colour for your inbox.
My friends S & N recently welcomed this little bundle of cuteness, Elsie, to their home and lives. I had the privilege to do a family photoshoot this weekend (Taking pictures of a puppy is hard!). Those who know me know how scared of dogs I am, but Elsie here is doing the heavy lifting to change all that, and looks, she might win very soon!
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Until next time!
Couldn’t agree more! Great post KC, enjoyed reading :)